Detachment
“You must first empty yourself of that which you are full, so that you may be filled of that which you are currently empty.”
~ Augustan
Our team has a Monday morning phone huddle. Just thirty minutes or so, but we solidly connect and jumpstart our week. We follow the same agenda every week.
verse, idea, or question that we all share our thoughts around
check-in from our weekend and a general check on how we are doing heading into the week
review any calendar issues that need addressing for the week
discuss any pressing issues that need addressing
Last week we started by asking everyone: What burdens or fears were we carrying that we needed to set aside? I know, a pretty big question right out of the gate on a Monday morning, but that is sort of how we roll. We’re all pretty used to responding to big questions on a moment’s notice. Asking the questions no one else asks is part of one of our core values!
Our answers ranged from a list of big things (clients, kids, parents, etc.) to nothing. The reality is that we are all carrying or shouldering big responsibilities, fears, or concerns. We may not even be aware of them, but most of them are likely clanging around in our subconscious.
The author and speaker, John Eldredge, says that our souls were meant to be village-sized. We were meant to be able to handle the trauma, difficulty, and concerns of a small village, town, or community. Carrying the collective understanding of the weight of the world so readily available through our media channels is literally soul-crushing.
No wonder we are so heavily medicated. Of course, uncertainty, anxiousness, and depression are so prevalent. If we are too aware of all that is going on out there, it is a wonder we even get out of bed in the morning.
In his book, Get Your Life Back, chapter two teaches the practice of “benevolent detachment”. A very simple, but powerful way to systematically pause several times a day and hand everyone and everything over to God. The author discusses it in this podcast and if you go to the thirty-five-minute mark, he’ll actually walk you through the process.
(Ransomed Heart has also created a One-Minute Pause App where they will walk you through the benevolent detachment process in 1, 3, 5, and 10 versions. Downloadable for free.)
We learned about this idea almost two years ago and have made it a regular practice for our team and us individually. We’ve even taught and practiced it with some of our clients. It has been a situational rescue and an overall lifesaver.
It has also made us more regularly aware of how much we are carrying around that isn’t ours to carry. Part of the process is to begin listing the things that come to mind as you “detach”. You might ask me how I am doing or what concerns I am carrying and I would typically tell you “great” and “none”.
And I wouldn’t be lying.
And it wouldn’t be the truth.
But I am becoming more of what I am carrying around and more practiced at benevolently detaching. I am experiencing the easier burden and lighter yoke I’ve been offered and it is making all the difference.
Consider
What concerns, fears or worries are you aware of right now?
What are you not aware of but affected by just the same?
Do you think your soul is exposed to more than it was meant to handle on a regular basis?
How much of a rescue would it be for you to benevolently detach?